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Thursday, March 12, 2015
Wednesday, March 11, 2015
Fail? or Success!
My recent parenting fail which I have now turned into my most recent parenting success.
Two weekends ago Liam was going to his very first friend birthday party. He was so excited and when I told him that we needed to go to the store to buy his friend a present, he was ecstatic.
We decided to get his friend a Busy Book, TMNT (that's Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles), since Liam already has 3 different ones and plays with them often. Once we entered the store I saw that they were all marked down about 50% and my brain said, "WooHoo! A sale! Let's buy them all!"
And instead of keeping my mouth shut and having a debate in my brain with myself I said, "Hey, look Liam, they have a superhero busy book, do you need this?" And what little boy would say anything different than "YES! Or actually I want this one!"
AAAAAAHHHHHHH!
Why did I just say that out loud!
I want to raise Liam into a caring, compassionate, loving boy, friend, man and husband. I do not want him to think everytime a friend or Caroline gets something that automatically means that he also gets a present as well.
Back pedal, back pedal, up a giant hill. Parenting fail.
Here's how I turned it around:
"You know what Liam? I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that. We are here because we are buying a present for your friend. This is his birthday and this day is about him, not you. We are just going to buy the present for your friend that we came into the store to get and then we are going to leave."
Did he throw a tantrum? Surprising not. Was he happy about what I had just said? Absolutely not.
And so I decided on the walk to the car that one lesson wasn't enough for Liam to learn in this moment. I decided to also teach Liam about saving and earning for the things we want in life. Our society, more than ever, is an acquisitive one where possessing as many material things that we can get is most people's priority. I want Liam to understand what it means to work hard for the things that you want.
So, I told him that another day we will come back and buy that special Busy Book. But he will have to work hard to be able to do that. We now have a point system in place. If he is helpful to his sister, myself or Evan in a way we feel is worthy, he gets a point. If he gets himself buckled into his carseat without screaming, he gets a point. If he is not being a good listener or doesn't eat his meals he gets points taken away. So far he is understanding this concept extremely well. So far Evan and I are loving this new concept as well for behavioral reasons.
He has about half of his 20 points needed in a week and a half. He's doing very well and we often hear, "Is that worth a point?"
Two weekends ago Liam was going to his very first friend birthday party. He was so excited and when I told him that we needed to go to the store to buy his friend a present, he was ecstatic.
We decided to get his friend a Busy Book, TMNT (that's Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles), since Liam already has 3 different ones and plays with them often. Once we entered the store I saw that they were all marked down about 50% and my brain said, "WooHoo! A sale! Let's buy them all!"
And instead of keeping my mouth shut and having a debate in my brain with myself I said, "Hey, look Liam, they have a superhero busy book, do you need this?" And what little boy would say anything different than "YES! Or actually I want this one!"
AAAAAAHHHHHHH!
Why did I just say that out loud!
I want to raise Liam into a caring, compassionate, loving boy, friend, man and husband. I do not want him to think everytime a friend or Caroline gets something that automatically means that he also gets a present as well.
Back pedal, back pedal, up a giant hill. Parenting fail.
Here's how I turned it around:
"You know what Liam? I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that. We are here because we are buying a present for your friend. This is his birthday and this day is about him, not you. We are just going to buy the present for your friend that we came into the store to get and then we are going to leave."
Did he throw a tantrum? Surprising not. Was he happy about what I had just said? Absolutely not.
And so I decided on the walk to the car that one lesson wasn't enough for Liam to learn in this moment. I decided to also teach Liam about saving and earning for the things we want in life. Our society, more than ever, is an acquisitive one where possessing as many material things that we can get is most people's priority. I want Liam to understand what it means to work hard for the things that you want.
So, I told him that another day we will come back and buy that special Busy Book. But he will have to work hard to be able to do that. We now have a point system in place. If he is helpful to his sister, myself or Evan in a way we feel is worthy, he gets a point. If he gets himself buckled into his carseat without screaming, he gets a point. If he is not being a good listener or doesn't eat his meals he gets points taken away. So far he is understanding this concept extremely well. So far Evan and I are loving this new concept as well for behavioral reasons.
He has about half of his 20 points needed in a week and a half. He's doing very well and we often hear, "Is that worth a point?"
Thursday, March 5, 2015
Happily Ever After? Not so much
Once upon a time there was a little boy who ate almost anything I put in front of him (except kiwi). He loved cauliflower, broccoli and even ate eggplant parmesan.
Then a 4 year old dragon, also known as current Liam, came into the kingdom and demanded Spaghetti O's, chicken nuggets, fish sticks and peanut butter and sandwiches. He only will eat those things and if there is something else on the menu he roars as loud as he can, stomps his feet and sprays fire through his nose.
Too dramatic for you? Don't believe me?
Tonight we had a new recipe that was highly recommended to me twice this week. Bisquick's Impossibly Easy Cheeseburger Pie. Was it a 5 star meal? Not quite. Did it pass at 3 1/2 stars? Most definitely. Would my 4 year old dragon eat it? Absolutely not.
He took his sweet time pushing the food around on his plate, telling me how he really didn't like what we were having for dinner and he didn't want to eat it. My response? I don't care. Eat what is on your plate or you will lose a point (more on that soon) and go directly to bed with no books. His response? But I want dessert! You can guess what I said to that request. Which lead to a whole lotta drama and continued demands of wanting dessert.
Once he realized I wasn't backing down and instead of just quickly eating the few bites on his plate so that he would not be in trouble, he very calmly looked at me and said, "I will just go to bed and get my point taken away because I am not eating this at all."
Even though I lost this battle against the fearsome, fire breathing dragon at least he was very polite about it.
Then a 4 year old dragon, also known as current Liam, came into the kingdom and demanded Spaghetti O's, chicken nuggets, fish sticks and peanut butter and sandwiches. He only will eat those things and if there is something else on the menu he roars as loud as he can, stomps his feet and sprays fire through his nose.
Too dramatic for you? Don't believe me?
Tonight we had a new recipe that was highly recommended to me twice this week. Bisquick's Impossibly Easy Cheeseburger Pie. Was it a 5 star meal? Not quite. Did it pass at 3 1/2 stars? Most definitely. Would my 4 year old dragon eat it? Absolutely not.
He took his sweet time pushing the food around on his plate, telling me how he really didn't like what we were having for dinner and he didn't want to eat it. My response? I don't care. Eat what is on your plate or you will lose a point (more on that soon) and go directly to bed with no books. His response? But I want dessert! You can guess what I said to that request. Which lead to a whole lotta drama and continued demands of wanting dessert.
Once he realized I wasn't backing down and instead of just quickly eating the few bites on his plate so that he would not be in trouble, he very calmly looked at me and said, "I will just go to bed and get my point taken away because I am not eating this at all."
Even though I lost this battle against the fearsome, fire breathing dragon at least he was very polite about it.
Sunday, March 1, 2015
It pays to be big
Turns out even bad guys will be nice if you're a giant.
Friday, February 20, 2015
Eight months
At eight months, Caroline is still very happy and an easygoing baby. Unless her teeth are bothering her we rarely hear her complain.
Caroline is still being introduced to many solid foods. She eats at breakfast and dinner and sometimes at lunch. She still hates peas, even though I bought some Gerber peas from the store, she still almost threw them all up. Caroline is intrigued with puffs but tries to swallow them before they dissolve therefore gagging herself and usually then throwing them up plus all the milk she has just drank. (so much fun!) She is also not a fan of yogurt. She loves all of her fruits. Blueberries and cherries are the newest additions and she is thrilled! Caroline nurses 4 times during the day and 1-2 times at night. She is not good with taking a bottle and most days with the babysitter will only drink 1-2 ounces at a time, twice while I am at work. (the baby who is a month younger than her at the babysitters usually takes 7 ounces with each bottle) I have a freezer stocked with frozen milk that I had anticipated her needing at this stage when my supply starts to dip. However, she may not need it after all. I may have to donate some once she is through nursing.
Caroline takes 2 naps, once in the morning and once in the afternoon, each one lasting about 1 1/2 - 2 1/2 hours. She will go to sleep at night between 7-8 pm and awake for good around 7-8 am. Sometimes only waking once to be fed and other nights twice.
Likes: Caroline still loves the bath. She is always kicking her legs splashing us with water and most recently, since she can sit up pretty well, also splashing with her hands. She in no way can be left unassisted in the tub while sitting up. As she is still slightly unsteady and the tub equals wet and slippery there are plenty of times where I am holding her arm and she tries to make a dive into the water. Thankfully I am right there. (is this some crazy trust exercise?)
She loves when we spend time with her playing with her toys, her picnic basket, her peek a boo flap books, when we tickle her and taking off her socks and bibs.
Dislikes: being ignored and teething.
Skills: Caroline's favorite sound is still "da-da" although it is not being used in context so therefore not a word yet. Today I heard her saying"mmmmommma" but once again not towards me so not talking yet. She is great at scooting around when on her belly and loves to open the flaps while reading her peek a boo books. She is very skilled at sitting by herself on dry land.
Health: Caroline had her sonogram done on her hips a couple weeks ago. While I was very concerned during the appointment since the radiology tech kept asking me why they were doing this and then brought in a doctor to help her, Dr. Akeson read the images and feels that her hips are staying in socket and that at this time further treatment is not needed. Yay! We will go back in April where she will have xrays again and another physical exam.
Caroline has been working on her upper front teeth for awhile now and today while I was flipping her upside down, I saw that they have officially broke through the gum! So, welcome teeth E & F.
We love our little squirt and continue to be so excited to watch her grow up!
Caroline is still being introduced to many solid foods. She eats at breakfast and dinner and sometimes at lunch. She still hates peas, even though I bought some Gerber peas from the store, she still almost threw them all up. Caroline is intrigued with puffs but tries to swallow them before they dissolve therefore gagging herself and usually then throwing them up plus all the milk she has just drank. (so much fun!) She is also not a fan of yogurt. She loves all of her fruits. Blueberries and cherries are the newest additions and she is thrilled! Caroline nurses 4 times during the day and 1-2 times at night. She is not good with taking a bottle and most days with the babysitter will only drink 1-2 ounces at a time, twice while I am at work. (the baby who is a month younger than her at the babysitters usually takes 7 ounces with each bottle) I have a freezer stocked with frozen milk that I had anticipated her needing at this stage when my supply starts to dip. However, she may not need it after all. I may have to donate some once she is through nursing.
Caroline takes 2 naps, once in the morning and once in the afternoon, each one lasting about 1 1/2 - 2 1/2 hours. She will go to sleep at night between 7-8 pm and awake for good around 7-8 am. Sometimes only waking once to be fed and other nights twice.
Likes: Caroline still loves the bath. She is always kicking her legs splashing us with water and most recently, since she can sit up pretty well, also splashing with her hands. She in no way can be left unassisted in the tub while sitting up. As she is still slightly unsteady and the tub equals wet and slippery there are plenty of times where I am holding her arm and she tries to make a dive into the water. Thankfully I am right there. (is this some crazy trust exercise?)
She loves when we spend time with her playing with her toys, her picnic basket, her peek a boo flap books, when we tickle her and taking off her socks and bibs.
Dislikes: being ignored and teething.
Skills: Caroline's favorite sound is still "da-da" although it is not being used in context so therefore not a word yet. Today I heard her saying"mmmmommma" but once again not towards me so not talking yet. She is great at scooting around when on her belly and loves to open the flaps while reading her peek a boo books. She is very skilled at sitting by herself on dry land.
Health: Caroline had her sonogram done on her hips a couple weeks ago. While I was very concerned during the appointment since the radiology tech kept asking me why they were doing this and then brought in a doctor to help her, Dr. Akeson read the images and feels that her hips are staying in socket and that at this time further treatment is not needed. Yay! We will go back in April where she will have xrays again and another physical exam.
Caroline has been working on her upper front teeth for awhile now and today while I was flipping her upside down, I saw that they have officially broke through the gum! So, welcome teeth E & F.
We love our little squirt and continue to be so excited to watch her grow up!
Caroline-3; Dad-1; Mom-0
Just because she's a baby doesn't mean that Caroline should be excluded from important life lessons.
Lesson #1:
If bathtime is your favorite time of the day and mom and dad just don't have enough time, make them give you what you want.
Catch the stomach flu from the babysitters.
Throw up your breakfast of prunes and carrots after your nap and then rub your face and hair in it.
Once the babysitter calls mom to come get you, you will surely get a bath.
If one bath is not enough, show Mom you mean business by throwing up again after she tried to nurse you for lunch.
And if two baths are not enough in one day, throw up again after your afternoon nap. But make sure you do it when Dad gets home and definitely wait until he tells Mom that maybe she shouldn't be nursing you as much as she is. Make sure that Mom has stated her case and thinks that she is right by feeding you as much as you want, and then throw up again everywhere. Then give Dad a thumbs up for helping him win an argument. Moms think they know everything!
Lesson #1:
If bathtime is your favorite time of the day and mom and dad just don't have enough time, make them give you what you want.
Catch the stomach flu from the babysitters.
Throw up your breakfast of prunes and carrots after your nap and then rub your face and hair in it.
Once the babysitter calls mom to come get you, you will surely get a bath.
If one bath is not enough, show Mom you mean business by throwing up again after she tried to nurse you for lunch.
And if two baths are not enough in one day, throw up again after your afternoon nap. But make sure you do it when Dad gets home and definitely wait until he tells Mom that maybe she shouldn't be nursing you as much as she is. Make sure that Mom has stated her case and thinks that she is right by feeding you as much as you want, and then throw up again everywhere. Then give Dad a thumbs up for helping him win an argument. Moms think they know everything!
Don't worry! I'm all better today. Just had to get my bathtime!
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